It’s been said that there are two Laws of Love:
- You can’t predict anything.
- It will change you.
The first, I instinctually want to reject, but also understand. As intuitive and proud of my observations I am, it’s impossible to predict what anyone or anything around love will produce. You can assume, and sometimes correctly, but overall, it’s the surprises that catch us most in love.
A peck on the cheek that catches you off guard.
Turning and noticing they’ve been quietly observing, admiring you.
Prediction leads to set expectations, and in my experience, the more expectation you have of someone, the more disappointed you end up at the end of it. Not to say you shouldn’t eventually set expectations, that’s healthy once you’re in a seemingly long term relationship, but during the infatuation stage, it hardly seems fair to have them.
I have been made the absolute happiest when I expected nothing, and was entirely blindsided by chemistry. What a beautiful feeling it is. *shudders, smirks, puts on country songs forever associated with that point in time and suddenly craves Larceny & Coke.*
The second rule, however, I could not agree more with. Love has the capacity to change everything about you, and somehow, only changes pieces. The gratification & affirmation love provides allows us to expand our form. Discovering someone else’s truth gives us permission to audit our own. And once we’re there, if we find something we aren’t entirely happy with, we’re given the support to change it.
Even when love ends, we are forced to resolve ourselves into a new being; learning to walk again without the crutch of the loved one we no longer have beside us.
Love provides us the tools necessary for a revolution of ourselves, or larger.
And revolutions are hardly predictable.